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Monday, July 29, 2013

Modest suggestion for Radio Derb

I'm a week behind, but at last listen the Derb's research assistants were working for the Democratic Party of Turkmenistan on slogans for the upcoming campaign against Emmanuel Goldstein's ragtag coalition of seditious rats. He should allow them indefinite leave there and find some new assistants. Aged 36, 41, and 34, respectively, Mandy, Candy, and Brandy, are surely losing their suppleness along with their sagacity. Spring chickens they are not.


Derb--if I may so audaciously address you directly--to inject your vessel with some warm, youthful energy, I modestly suggest you bring Miley, Riley, and Kiley on board as replacements.


There's a remunerative bonus to boot. As millennials, they're perfectly content to take nodes, er, notes and deliver massages, er, messages, for zero compensation. In fact, they'll fall all over themselves just for the opportunity. Ah, the benefits of living in the age of open borders and zero marginal productivity workers!

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